Sometimes visiting my parents’ house brings back interesting
memories. Today I dropped by, and my mom
showed me an invitation to my 14-year-old cousin’s 8th grade
graduation. I find it totally impossible
that little Jack who I held in my arms just yesterday (ok, in 1999) is now
probably over 6 feet tall, smarter than most people I know, and graduating from
8th grade!
I was thinking back to my own graduation. It was a small class (13 people…it was a small, rural school), so each of us got a lot of attention. We were all supposed to write something about our future plans, to be read by the emcee as we individually walked out into the audience to give our parents a rose. I wrote that I would like to go to college after high school, and earn a degree in psychology.
I was thinking about how similar that is to what actually happened, and how that’s really not accidental at all. I have this fantastic aunt who I admire and adore. She is 9 years younger than my dad, and 17 years older than me, so closer to my age than most aunts are. When I was in about 2nd grade or so, she was in graduate school studying to be a counselor. I remember asking my mom what a counselor was and what they do, and as my mom explained that to me, something just clicked for me, and I knew that’s what I wanted to do, or something similar.
It’s the difference between a career and a vocation. A career is simply a professional path. A vocation, in my mind, is part of you. It is part of your calling, what you are meant to do and part of who you are meant to be. Something at least marginally related to the world of counseling, I believe, is my vocation. And I happened to be lucky enough to stumble across it at a young age. And as I learned more about social work and what it is and how it relates to the field of counseling but is more specifically related to anti-oppression and social justice…I just feel so blessed to have been led into this field. I feel like it fits my personality, and that it has also helped shape who I am. I say “led into the field” rather than “stumbled into the field,” because as a Catholic Christian, I believe that God has been guiding me here all along, and He has specific work for me to do that I may not even know about yet.
To look back and think about all the ways I got to where I am now by twists and turns like a river just amazes me.
I specifically chose to apply to a Master’s of Social Work program because when I decided to really pursue a career as a counselor (more on that in a minute) I had a roommate who wanted to be a children’s play therapist, and she explained to me that in Oregon, you can only bill insurance for therapy (at least at the Master’s level) if you are licensed as a clinical social worker. (That has since changed: it changed during my first year in graduate school, which I did not get into until my third year of applying. It sends shivers up my spine. If that had happened one year earlier, I may have tried to become an LPC or an LMFT, but I am SO glad I ended up in social work!)
Even though I knew since elementary school that I wanted to be a counselor of some sort, I spent several years convinced that I wanted to do something else (Youth Ministry, to be specific). I probably would have enjoyed it and everything, and it is a very important vocation, but I now believe that it just wasn’t mine. In some ways it had elements of what I really wanted to be doing, and I was passionate about that too (and truthfully could have probably been quite happy doing it), but I now believe that it wasn’t what I was called to do.
The reason I gave up on the idea of being a counselor is so ridiculously silly (in retrospect, of course) that I almost hesitate to share the story of why. It was all because of a conversation with an older cousin of mine, when I was probably 11 or 12. This particular cousin is about as wonderful and positive of a person as you could imagine, and by no means would have said anything intentionally discouraging. I was talking to her about my aunt and her job, and my cousin simply said (admiringly) “Yeah, it takes a special kind of person to do what Janet does.” For some stupid ass reason, I interpreted this to mean that this kind of person was EXTREMELY rare, and then further analyzed it down to this rationale: There could not possibly be two people from the same family who could do that kind of job. Janet was already doing it, so I was out, I should just pick something else to do with my life. Kids are weird, and I was apparently an exceptionally weird one. (Seriously…what the heck?) What’s even weirder is that I held on to that for YEARS. The comment my cousin made was not even remotely directed at me. In fact, when I said at my 8th grade graduation that I would like to earn a degree in psychology, I kinda just said that for something to say, still thinking I needed to choose something else. When I finally realized that I really wanted to do counseling (or something related) and not youth ministry, I was 21 and on a retreat in college. The realization hit me like a ton of bricks, and I completely changed career paths in less than a minute, literally. I spent the rest of the weekend SUPER EXCITED about my new plans, talked to an advisor that week when I got back to Corvallis, and changed my major from Spanish and Education (yes, these things did fit in with my Youth Ministry career goal) to Sociology, and I haven’t looked back since.
What I am really trying to say here is that I think we all have a vocation. We all have ways in which our lives are given meaning, and which we give meaning to other people. For some, this is through paid employment. For others, it is through family life, volunteer work, or just who they are, perhaps a passionate hobby or something of the like. Whatever that vocation is, it is bound to begin showing up in your life over and over, and it is unlikely to let go of you if you are unwilling to acknowledge and welcome it! As a human being, you are precious, you are worth so much, and you have so much to give to others. Be open to it! All of what I just said is less a compliment/affirmation, and more of a challenge. What are you going to do with your gifts?
As for me, my role right now isn’t explicitly counseling, and that’s ok. I have an incredible opportunity to help women in a bad position make their lives a little better, worth living. Sometimes I get worn out or irritable, and it is so important for me to return to work tomorrow (after a fantastic 4 day weekend) ready to remember my vocation, my calling, and to remember that I have something I need to give, as well as much to learn from the amazing women I get to work with.
I was thinking back to my own graduation. It was a small class (13 people…it was a small, rural school), so each of us got a lot of attention. We were all supposed to write something about our future plans, to be read by the emcee as we individually walked out into the audience to give our parents a rose. I wrote that I would like to go to college after high school, and earn a degree in psychology.
I was thinking about how similar that is to what actually happened, and how that’s really not accidental at all. I have this fantastic aunt who I admire and adore. She is 9 years younger than my dad, and 17 years older than me, so closer to my age than most aunts are. When I was in about 2nd grade or so, she was in graduate school studying to be a counselor. I remember asking my mom what a counselor was and what they do, and as my mom explained that to me, something just clicked for me, and I knew that’s what I wanted to do, or something similar.
It’s the difference between a career and a vocation. A career is simply a professional path. A vocation, in my mind, is part of you. It is part of your calling, what you are meant to do and part of who you are meant to be. Something at least marginally related to the world of counseling, I believe, is my vocation. And I happened to be lucky enough to stumble across it at a young age. And as I learned more about social work and what it is and how it relates to the field of counseling but is more specifically related to anti-oppression and social justice…I just feel so blessed to have been led into this field. I feel like it fits my personality, and that it has also helped shape who I am. I say “led into the field” rather than “stumbled into the field,” because as a Catholic Christian, I believe that God has been guiding me here all along, and He has specific work for me to do that I may not even know about yet.
To look back and think about all the ways I got to where I am now by twists and turns like a river just amazes me.
I specifically chose to apply to a Master’s of Social Work program because when I decided to really pursue a career as a counselor (more on that in a minute) I had a roommate who wanted to be a children’s play therapist, and she explained to me that in Oregon, you can only bill insurance for therapy (at least at the Master’s level) if you are licensed as a clinical social worker. (That has since changed: it changed during my first year in graduate school, which I did not get into until my third year of applying. It sends shivers up my spine. If that had happened one year earlier, I may have tried to become an LPC or an LMFT, but I am SO glad I ended up in social work!)
Even though I knew since elementary school that I wanted to be a counselor of some sort, I spent several years convinced that I wanted to do something else (Youth Ministry, to be specific). I probably would have enjoyed it and everything, and it is a very important vocation, but I now believe that it just wasn’t mine. In some ways it had elements of what I really wanted to be doing, and I was passionate about that too (and truthfully could have probably been quite happy doing it), but I now believe that it wasn’t what I was called to do.
The reason I gave up on the idea of being a counselor is so ridiculously silly (in retrospect, of course) that I almost hesitate to share the story of why. It was all because of a conversation with an older cousin of mine, when I was probably 11 or 12. This particular cousin is about as wonderful and positive of a person as you could imagine, and by no means would have said anything intentionally discouraging. I was talking to her about my aunt and her job, and my cousin simply said (admiringly) “Yeah, it takes a special kind of person to do what Janet does.” For some stupid ass reason, I interpreted this to mean that this kind of person was EXTREMELY rare, and then further analyzed it down to this rationale: There could not possibly be two people from the same family who could do that kind of job. Janet was already doing it, so I was out, I should just pick something else to do with my life. Kids are weird, and I was apparently an exceptionally weird one. (Seriously…what the heck?) What’s even weirder is that I held on to that for YEARS. The comment my cousin made was not even remotely directed at me. In fact, when I said at my 8th grade graduation that I would like to earn a degree in psychology, I kinda just said that for something to say, still thinking I needed to choose something else. When I finally realized that I really wanted to do counseling (or something related) and not youth ministry, I was 21 and on a retreat in college. The realization hit me like a ton of bricks, and I completely changed career paths in less than a minute, literally. I spent the rest of the weekend SUPER EXCITED about my new plans, talked to an advisor that week when I got back to Corvallis, and changed my major from Spanish and Education (yes, these things did fit in with my Youth Ministry career goal) to Sociology, and I haven’t looked back since.
What I am really trying to say here is that I think we all have a vocation. We all have ways in which our lives are given meaning, and which we give meaning to other people. For some, this is through paid employment. For others, it is through family life, volunteer work, or just who they are, perhaps a passionate hobby or something of the like. Whatever that vocation is, it is bound to begin showing up in your life over and over, and it is unlikely to let go of you if you are unwilling to acknowledge and welcome it! As a human being, you are precious, you are worth so much, and you have so much to give to others. Be open to it! All of what I just said is less a compliment/affirmation, and more of a challenge. What are you going to do with your gifts?
As for me, my role right now isn’t explicitly counseling, and that’s ok. I have an incredible opportunity to help women in a bad position make their lives a little better, worth living. Sometimes I get worn out or irritable, and it is so important for me to return to work tomorrow (after a fantastic 4 day weekend) ready to remember my vocation, my calling, and to remember that I have something I need to give, as well as much to learn from the amazing women I get to work with.
